In the past twenty or so years, technology has given us
many new ways to “communicate”. From the internet to cell phones to Facebook
and Twitter, people have so many new ways to interact with other people. You
might think these new tools and devices would make communication easier and
that we would all be closer as a result. NOT!
I want to share with you my thoughts (or perhaps my
rant!) about these new technologies. Although these new ways to communicate can
help connect us to others, I believe cell phones and social media have, in
reality, created a false sense of what true communication is.
The connections one has in Social Media such as Facebook
and Twitter has become to be a definition of how popular we are. Have you been
asked how many friends you have on Facebook or followers on Twitter? The real
question is how many of those friends or followers do you really know in person
– face to face. If you post some news on
Facebook and no one comments or Likes it, are any of your friends listening?
Can the news you want to share or tweet on Twitter really be done justice in
140 characters or less? How many followers will re-tweet it? It may leave you
wondering if you had any communication at all.
Once all of the members in my family had cell phones, I
began to see new and unsettling behavior in my family. Strange beeps and vibrations
coming from other people’s cell phones. Is that a text, an email, a reminder?
After this sound the bizarre behavior commences. Any conversation that was
happening stops abruptly. In lieu of whatever was occurring, a cell phone or
Ipad has now taken center stage. The fingers are tapping furiously on the touch
pad of the phone or tablet in response to the beep or tone. Some text, email,
picture or video has stolen away the flow of real conversation. WE are slowly
transforming into one of Pavlov’s experiments. He trained dogs to respond to a
beep, tone or bell. Mind you, this device is supposed keep us in touch with
each other. I think it may have backfired on us as a species.
I see my son and his friends all together to visit at our
house because they haven’t SEEN each other in weeks. They are lined up on the
couches and chairs all in one room yet glued to their cell phone and not
visiting each other at all. Or I love this one. I am at one end of our very
small house and I get a text….from my daughter who is at the other end of the
house. Really? Please get up and come talk to me in person. I will admit though
I do think it is cute when my husband video Skypes me from his office in the
house when I am in the other office. Maybe I like this because he does it to
say something sweet! I cannot completely knock these new tools because I met my
husband on Match.com and that would not have happened without the internet.
These tools have not created better or real
communication. Real communication involves an exchange of give and take in real
time. Speaking and listening are happening together. Even email is not real
communication. It lacks the facial expressions, the vocal tones and body
language that give communication real depth and true meaning. I suggest we all
make a pact to be renegades and just call each other up and make plans to go to
lunch or have a cup of coffee. Maybe we could even turn our cell phones off
during this time together. Then we might have a real communication….face to
face, person to person with real voices speaking and real ears listening. Wow!
How primitive and so last century that would be.
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